Damn Those Pigmies
by Ramen II
Summary: After one drunken evening with my sister we came up with this... When Yugioh, Beyblade and Harry Potter unite in a very random, very insane battle royal against anyone and anything they can find... pairings are obvious
1. Chapter 1

Hello there people, I know I should be working on something else but I can't be bothered at the moment so here is a little story that my cousin wrote with my help last week, warnings for occasional language and Kaiba, Malfoy and Kai being totally hot.

Kai: shut the hell up!

Grace: I agree with Kai, just get on with it.

Me: stupid cousins always stabbing you in the back sees grace with knife gah!

Grace: hehe evil smirk

Kai: ahh if only

Me: shut up Kai… well my cousin and I were sitting around and we were having fun with ideas and she said…

Grace: wouldn't it be fun to write a story where all the characters from our favourite shows came together

Me: so here it is… Yugioh and beyblade characters mixed with a bit of Harry potter for ya… enjoy

Kai: you forget one important thing…

Me + grace: … … …

Kai: sigh: they don't own the anime's… or Harry potter, cos if they did we would all be in deep trouble

Me + grace: hey!

Chapter 1 

"Joey calm down we're almost there" serenity told her almost hyper brother, she laughed when he caught sight of Yugi, tea and Mai, she briefly wondered about Kaiba, who Yugi had somehow managed to drag along but the sight of her brother running full pelt at the group distracted her.

'FOOD' Joey launched himself at the basket; suddenly Kaiba materialized and stole the basket out of Joey's hands making him fall flat on his face.

'Yes Joey food now will you shut up…"

"While we lay out the picnic' Yugi continued glaring at Kaiba. Suddenly from beside a tree they heard voices.

'Tyson, where is this so called… Huh?' said a strange looking guy with very long hair

'Oh crap I walked in to the wrong anime… again! Sorry guys' the boy said to no one in particular.

'Rei what the hell are you doing?' they all looked toward the sound of the voice, seeing a black and white film strip being pulled away by a boy with blue triangles on his face standing next to a different tree, looking very miffed.

'FOOD' suddenly a large blue and red mass swarmed the picnic basket, Joey; not wanting to let the food go without a fight launched himself toward the basket with every intent of eating everything in his path.

'Shit we've let him loose, now we're never going to get him back now' the boy with blue triangles cursed.

'Hey I haven't eaten since yesterday can we join in' said a blond hared boy with a large grin on his face.

'Yeah why not I mean if there is anything left that is' Yugi said gesturing towards the two boys head first in the picnic basket 'hey guys come on we've stumbled onto a picnic' shouted the blond boy behind him as he stepped out of the tear in the film strip.

Joey stuck his head out of the basket 'How many are there of you lot' said Joey in a rather scared voice.

'Only two more, by the way I'm max' he said quite happily 'this is Kai' pointing towards the guy with the triangles who leant against the tree apparently unimpressed 'that is Tyson the one in the picnic basket' said boy stuck his head out of the picnic basket to wave, sticking it back in again to continue eating 'and you already ready know Rei' by this time a small looking lad and a very pretty girl (well Kaiba thought so) had come through the rip and then it closed 'and this is Kenny and Hilary'

'Hi' they said in tune

'Well its nice to meat you' said Mai

'Yes I am Yugi, this is Mai and that's Kaiba' he looked equally as unimpressed as Kai 'this is Tea and that's Joey' he pointed towards the yellow blur who also looked up and smiled and continued eating.

'Right! Now we know each other shall we eat?' asked tea.

'Yes we shall' agreed max it turned out that Tyson and Joey had eaten all the food (no surprises there) so they went to the restaurant down town all the way Kaiba was talking to Kai they were deep in conversion. They got to the restaurant and sat down and started ordering when Yugi shouted 'hey Ryou… guys meet Ryou' and he explained who everyone was and also sat down to eat.

Tyson noticed, through his gorging that Kaiba stared at Hilary a lot throughout the meal, he nudged Yugi and pointed, Yugi grinned.

When they finished their food the decided to walk it off (by the amount Joey and Tyson eat you would have to walk for days) they were all talking amongst them self's when the came another tear in the fabric and a boy with stark blond hair poked his head out "hang on a minute! Aren't we supposed to be meeting the blade breakers?"

'Malfoy' screamed Tyson.

The End 

Kai: Ahh a beautiful ending to a crap story

Malfoy: well I thought my entrance was the highlight of the chapter

Tyson: so you're sure we ate all the food and your not just saying that so I can't have any?

Joey: mouth full of food: yesh, I'm shore

Me: probs publishing the next chapter… umm

Grace: in a few days

Kaiba: your actually continuing this thing?

Me: yes, yes we are

Kai: oh god no

Grace: Kaiba your so hot

Kaiba: what!

Grace: oops, did I say that out loud? Blushes

Kaiba: yes, yes you did

Me: okay now shut up

Max: comes from nowhere GET OUT! GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

Me: but stay to review…

Max: THEN GET OUT!

Grace: that's like an order, aren't you supposed to be warning people

Me: oh shut up

Grace: fine

Tyson, Joey, Kai, Kaiba, Malfoy, grace, max and me: BYE!

Kai: I can't believe you made me do that (-. -)

Authors note: I'm sorry, I'm so very, very sorry for making you people read that… Grace I hope your bloody happy now!


	2. Chapter 2

Hello there again people, after the first chapter's stunning entry onto your screen I've decided to update… mostly because I've got this chapter pre-written and it's an easy update… Dear God why am I doing this to you people!  
Many thanks goes out to both Amanita Virosa and Darkroses12 who reviewed this story and made me grin :) Cheers guys.

Warnings: More silliness and pairings, more of the boys being hot, language and Joey wheeler.  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything… infact I wash my hands of the entire thing!

Kaiba: what were we talking about?  
Me: Oh I remember grace just told Kaiba that she thinks he's hot.  
Grace: no I didn't… you just made that up!  
Me: … Umm no… hey it's true though you do!  
Kaiba: 0.o …  
Grace: (cringes) c-c can we c-c carry on please.  
Kai: great plan… so... Get on with it.  
Me: well if you thought the last one we did was good…  
Grace: you need taste  
Me: quiet you… Kaiba lover  
Grace: OI shut up you…  
Kaiba: can we just get on with it; the story is enough to make us cry to start with… let alone your incoherent babble  
Me: aww did you cry Kai… Do you want to hold my hand?  
Kai: …death…  
Me: 0.0… okay then… well we're about to find out about our first paring between ka…  
Grace, Kai and Kaiba: SHUT UP you'll give the story away  
Me: sorry… oh just read and find out

**  
Chapter 2**

'Malfoy'

"I'd prefer to be called Draco if you please" said the blond boy. Ray mumbled so only Kenny could hear "They have a lot of weird names in this story"

"OI CAPTIN POROXIED WHATS THE HOLD UP?" said some one from behind said blond. Draco rolled his eyes.

"Oh shut up scar head"

"I HEARD THAT!"

"Ok, ok hold your dementors" Draco climbed through to reveal a very pretty brown bushy head girl followed closely by and rather lanky ginger haired boy after that was a tall boy with jet black hair and deep green eyes and a lighting bolt scar on his forehead.

"Finally what was the…"

"We are not supposed to be here, are we?" asked the lanky boy to the brown haired girl.

"No Ron we're right where we're supposed to be" the girl bit back sarcastically.

"No we are not we... Oh right"

"I told you I should of steered Hermione but nooo," said the boy with black hair.

"Shut up Harry and are we going to introduce ourselves or stand here like a load of babbling idiots" spat the girl.

"Sorry where are my manners this is idiot number 1" said Draco.

"Oi shut up'

"Only joking this is Ron" he shoved his thumb towards the ginger haired boy "this is Harry" pointing to the black haired boy "this is Hermione" the girl gave a soft "hi" "and I am Draco Malfoy other wise called Draco"

"Well now that's done and dusted why don't I introduce you to our friends" said max

By the time everyone had become acquainted with each other it was getting late and everyone needed a place to stay so the girls went of with Mai and the boys when to Kaiba's mansion.

--- ---

They were all up at 8 o'clock (Tyson had to be woken up 7 times before they nicked his covers an ran away with them) the boys were meeting the girls at 10 at the mall. The girls were sat on a bench waiting for them. "Hi guys" tea said waving them over.

"Hi what are we all going to do today?" Joey asked hoping beyond hope it wasn't what he thought it was.

"Well we are going on a…"

"SHOPPING SPREE" they all said in time, except Hermione who looked a bit disgruntled.

"Fine we will go and do other stuff," replied Kai

"See ya" said the girls as they dragged Hermione off.

"Well now that we've got rid of them… what do we do now?" Yugi asked, Tyson max and Joey got a glint in their eyes, Kai and Kaiba groaned, knowing what ever was going to happen was not going to be enjoyable.

"GO-KARTING!"

--- ---

"But she's not your type trust me" Kai whispered.

"But that's the point see is exactly the opposite I think that's why I like her" replied Kaiba, they had refused to 'go kart' and were now talking together, on a bench in a beautiful park that neither cared about.

"She's good and all for making you train, and I suppose she's not the worse looking girl around but I just don't think…" said Kai checking the area for listening brats i.e. the blade breakers.

"Look will you just introduce me to her when she gets back" whispered Kaiba frantically.

"Ok I will they should be here soon there are already five minutes late." They had called the girls to meet them at the park, Kai knew girls and he wasn't really surprised "probably got ambushed at a sale"

And sure enough the girls came around the corner at that very moment "hi guys well what have you been doing?" asked Hilary.

"Not much" replied Kai "hey Hilary I want you to meet Kaiba…"

**The End**

Grace: oooooooo Kaiba's got a girl friend, Kaiba's got a girlfriend  
ai: yeah… aren't you jealous  
Grace…  
Me: well I guess you guys are dying to know the pairings for the next chapter…  
Grace, Kaiba, and Kai: SHUT UP FOR THE LAST TIME!  
Me: ok, ok well the next one is better than this one  
(Threatening look from the others)  
Me: that's all I'm saying… please review  
Kaiba, Grace, Kai and me: (big breath) bb…  
Kai: Oh no you not making me do that again… (Walks off)  
Max: KAI GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN- I oh… yeah you have… GOOD BYE!

Author's note: Oh dear god I'm so sorry… Again!


End file.
